


Decisive

by SlipOfAScribe



Series: Vacillation [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Declarations Of Love, Derek Takes Care Of Stiles, Derek and Stiles are Mates, M/M, Protective Derek Hale, Referenced Suicide Attempt, Sick Stiles, Smut, True Love, Werewolf Stiles Stilinski
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-04-19 16:24:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4753028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlipOfAScribe/pseuds/SlipOfAScribe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles comes home after months at the hospital, not sure what to expect from his coming first full moon as a werewolf. Derek is right by his side, ready to take care of him through everything. John Stilinski might also have redecorated their loft... He definitely did (they now have drapes).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Coming Home

The first night that Stiles crawled back into his and Derek’s bed, God help him, he cried. It wasn’t a heavy active cry, but tears fell slowly down his face as the scent of Derek overwhelmed him. It was a dark, heady smell that hit his palate like deep spices. He could almost feel it tingling across his skin as the sheets were draped across his body.

Derek slipped in the bed behind him, setting his back against the headboard, and pulled Stiles up against him. Stiles let himself be molded into place, fitting easily between Derek’s legs with his head tucked up neatly beneath Derek’s chin. He could feel the older man’s breath puff across his hair on each exhale, could feel the rise and fall of his chest. Not a word was said about the tears that fell, and Stiles was thankful for Derek’s naturally quiet nature; it was a comfort. When Stiles had settled some and his breathing was slow and normal, Stiles felt Derek shift and curl his arms around Stiles’ waist. The heavy feel of them wasn’t normally uncomfortable, but something about it reminded Stiles of the tight feeling of a blanket wrapped low on his body. They rhythmic pulse of Derek’s breathing suddenly sounded like the hiss-puff of the ventilator they’d had to hook Stiles up to for a time when his body had decided it didn’t want to breath on its own. 

Panic flashed through Stiles’ mind like a high dose of adderall. His emotions flared in an instant and his hands scrabbled at Derek’s arms trying to pry them away. There was a minimal tussle with bodies before Stiles was off the bed and leaning against the far wall, a hand across his middle, and the other pressed above his head to hold him upright. 

Everything was incredibly still for a few long breaths, then noise started to filter back to him. The creak of the bed, the soft click of the bedside lamp, and the soft thump as Derek’s feet touched down on the ground. Stiles’ body tensed as he waited for the hands to touch down on him again but it never came. With his eyes still squeezed tightly shut, Stiles turned and pressed his back to the wall. Somehow, Derek kept up the soft noises, the regular mundane noises of life. Stiles could hear him shifting his feet, could hear him shuffling his hands into his pockets and then back out again after a moment. He heard him pop the kinks in his back, his knuckles one by one. It helped.

Slowly, Stiles blinked his eyes open again and Derek was standing a few feet away just watching. He was clearly trying to keep his features neutral in some shape of reassurance for Stiles, but his eyebrows wouldn’t listen to that command. They were furrowed deep over his eyes, casting the colour into shadow. 

“I’m sorry.” The words were barely a whisper and yet sounded as clear as a shout to Stiles’ own ears. He wondered if the werewolf’s ears picked it up even louder. “I’m sorry I just… it was suddenly like I was…”

Derek waited until Stiles couldn’t speak anymore and then moved forward. He lifted one hand and Stiles watched it as Derek placed a palm to his cheek, thumb caressing his cheekbone. “You don’t have to apologize for anything, Stiles. Just let me know what you need and I’ll be there for you.”

He managed to nod and stepped closer, slinging his arms around Derek’s trim waist. He put his nose to Derek’s neck and rubbed, then inhaled. That spice-scent invaded his senses again and coated his tongue. “Can we go to the couch? The bed is just too much right now. I can’t… I need to get the hospital out of my head.”

A hand smoothed down Stiles’ back and Derek nodded. They slowly moved out to the living area, pausing when Stiles needed to tuck his face back into Derek and ground himself via his mate. Derek was ever patient with him, running circles over his lower back when they stopped. Once on the couch, Stiles managed to position himself to where he could tuck into Derek and see the television at the same time. They turned it on and Derek handed him the remote, letting him flip obnoxiously through the package of channels without a complaint about wanting to stick to one show. Eventually he did settle on the old game show channel, people in 70’s outfits competing for vacations and things like that playing at a low volume. 

Stiles was surprised that Derek was still awake after their long day of traveling and settling back in, but there he was, reclining beneath Stiles with his eyes alert. Silently, Stiles was grateful for this as well. His mate seemed to know just what he needed and how to give it to him. It was as if Stiles had never left, had never given Derek a reason to turn bitter towards him. It made him want to cry again. 

Instead, Stiles sat up a bit more, trailing his fingers over Derek’s shoulders and chest in odd, randomized patterns. “Am I werewolf now?”

Derek chuckled out a breath. “Basically. You haven’t had your first full moon yet, but it’s about to happen. I’ll help you through it.”

“When’s the full moon?” Stiles turned his head towards the bay windows, looking for the moon. There were long drapes the covered them which hadn’t ever been there before. Stiles turned questioning eyes at him.

“Your father thought the loft could use some...things.” He shrugged and reached up, brushing Stiles’ unruly hair back from his forehead. “The full moon will be here in four days. Your skin might be itchy already, and your senses are going to be heightening. Normally it’s an immediate change but it seems to be happening slower with you.”

“Why?” Stiles didn’t feel worried, for whatever reason the way Derek said it didn’t bring him alarm, only curiosity.

Derek shrugged a little. “I assume your body is working out correcting the illness, and then bringing you to proper werewolf norms. I’ve been watching carefully and I don’t see a reason to worry. We’ll know more after the full moon.”

Stiles nodded and snuggled back up to Derek. “I remember Scott’s change happened basically overnight, but asthma is probably easier to correct than frontotemporal dementia.”

“Probably.” Derek ducked his head and set his lips to Stiles’ cheek. “It’ll be fine.”

Reaching up before he could pull away, Stiles held him in place and leaned in placing their lips together. The kiss was soft, barely a movement of lips, but Stiles needed it. The familiar caress sent shivers through his body and their breath mingled when they pulled apart again. Something lit up in Derek’s eyes and as Stiles stared back, he felt it coil low in his own belly. There was a need that came back, a need they hadn’t had in the last couple of months before Stiles had left and he knew it had been his fault, his drawing away that caused it. They fell together again suddenly, Derek’s leg dropping over the edge of the couch to accommodate Stiles shifting his hips over. Stiles put his arms around Derek’s shoulders and curled a hand up over the back of his head to tangle in his hair. Now the kiss was far from chaste. Their lips parted and tongues tasted one another once more.

If Stiles had thought Derek’s scent had been intoxicating now, the taste of him was like honey from the Gods. It followed the same as his scent, a rich outlandish sort of spice and Stiles wondered how he hadn’t tasted this before. He had to pull back and take a breath or he might drown in Derek. They sat for a moment with their foreheads together, just breathing. 

“I need you.” Stiles’ voice cracked with the words and his fingers stuttered through Derek’s mussed hair. “I missed you, even before I left. I”m sorry, I really am, that I pulled away and I left and I didn’t tell you because I couldn’t or I thought I couldn’t and I was scared to lose you and,” he sucked in a breath ignoring the soft shushing Derek was giving him. “And I need you now Derek, even if it’s selfish because I’m sure you’re still angry or hurting but please, let me be selfish just a little longer and then I’ll make it all up to you.”

Stiles would have kept going, he would have kept spilling his guilt out in the quiet air of the apartment, over the soft background noise of the game show channel but Derek cut him off with a quick, hard kiss. He pulled back from Stiles as quickly as he had darted in, but it was enough to pause Stiles’ words. 

Derek’s hands moved across Stiles’ chest, pushing him back lengthwise on the couch and he followed after him. Stiles let himself lie back, head resting on the bundled throw blanket at that end of the couch and watched Derek press his face close again. He held his breath when he saw his lips move wordlessly. He knew Derek always took a moment to open up.

“I need you as much as you need me, Genim.” It was all that was needed before the two collapsed into one another.

~*~*~*~

Derek moved them back to the bedroom and divested the two of them in short order, his need to touch his mate after so long burning hot through his veins. When Stiles lie naked before him Derek’s hands flexed and sprawled out across the pale expanse of chest. He was thinner now, less muscular from the time spent in the hospital. He tried not to let any concern cloud the bliss he was feeling at having Stiles back where he belonged. The way Stiles reached out and smoothed his fingers over Derek’s brow let him know he wasn’t doing a great job at hiding the worry.

With a smile, he leaned down and pressed his lips across Stiles’ collarbones, tonguing along the hollow of his throat. He buried his nose against his neck and inhaled deeply. The smell of him was changing. He was losing the sweet sugary smell that Derek had realized in the hospital was his sickness and it was being replaced by a mix of musk and, surprisingly, citrus. As Derek tongued across a taut nipple, he suspected the almost fruity scent and smell of Stiles was natural to his human side, the musk coming with his wolf. 

Stiles pressed up into his touch when Derek ran his hands along his thighs and reached around to cup his ass. With a chuckle, he squeezed and then rubbed his thumbs along the outside of Stiles’ thighs, flicking his tongue over the other nipple at the same time. Stiles’ whole body reacted, hands tightening in Derek’s hair, hips lifting up off of the bed, and muscles tensing. 

Derek worked his way down Stiles’ body, taking his time at his favorite spots (Derek really liked the jut of his hipbones and noises he made when they were being nipped at). By the time he took Stiles’ cock in his hand, he was half hard. He drew himself down and took in a deep breath, refamiliarizing himself with the scent of Stiles, the feel of him reacting in pleasure. Pressing his lips to the head of Stiles’ cock, Derek drew his tongue around it and listened to Stiles hum pleasantly. Derek opened his lips further and took him in his mouth, slowly sliding down to the base. On the third stroke of his mouth, Derek recognized Stiles at his most erect and he twirled his tongue back around the head. 

He let one of his hands drift down Stiles’ thigh and pressed it upwards, opening him up. Stiles hefted the leg up over Derek’s shoulder and they both chuckled at the familiar position. They hadn’t been together like this in quite a long time but it still came naturally. Derek ran his fingers down past his balls and ran a circular massage across his perineum while he pressed a tongue at the underside of Stiles’ cock, dragging his tongue upwards. When he slicked his mouth back down quickly, he pressed his fingers down as well, circling his rim teasingly. 

Stiles pressed up from the mattress again, his heel pressing into Derek’s back and they both groaned together. “Fff-” Stiles’ breath hitched. “Fuck. Derek, fu-uck.”

Even with Stiles in his mouth, he laughed and the vibrations ran through them both. The growl of the wolf’s appreciation burbled up and when it was returned by another growl Derek had never heard before, he pulled up. Stiles’ eyes were burning with a golden glow and Derek recognized a wolf staring back at him. He felt a heat slip through his own body and a wolf peered back with red eyes at Stiles. Reaching upwards, Derek pressed two fingers to Stiles’ mouth, pressing them inside and over his tongue. Stiles obediently lapped at them, twirling his tongue around and soaking them in saliva. 

When Derek determined them good and ready, he withdrew from Stiles’ mouth and pressed at his tight ass. Stiles dropped a knee to the side, his other still wrapped up over Derek’s shoulder, and tried to push himself down on the fingers. Derek let him and pushed back. Spit slicked fingers slid easily inside of Stiles and he let out a happy growl, his body tightening around Derek’s fingers.

“More, please, I need more.” Stiles’ voice was a whine followed by panting. 

Derek obliged, edging his fingers up inside Stiles and circling about where he thought the younger man’s prostate sat. Judging from the new gasp he received, he was spot on. He curled his fingers to drag heavily over it again, then pulsed his fingers in and out slowly. Stiles stretched and tightened around each stroke. 

“Do you want to cum, Stiles?” Derek’s voice was like gravel and he slightly surprised himself with this. His fingers dove back inside of Stiles.

“Not yet, I want you to fuck me first.” Stiles’ voice was wrecked, filled with a whine once more. It sent shockwaves through Derek’s body, settling a punch in his lower belly that made his cock twitch in response. He ached for the same thing but had to make sure.

Nodding, Derek slipped his fingers out and rubbed them on the comforter. They’d wash the bedding eventually, anyway. He leaned over to the bedside table, wanting this absence from Stiles’ body to be quick. Stiles dropped his leg so Derek could more easier and stared up at him from the bed, a small smile in the corner of his lips. Derek applied the lubricant over his cock and tossed the little bottle aside.

“I missed you,” Stiles hummed. 

That made him pause. Derek felt a few emotions pass through him, across his face he was sure, then he quickly dropped back down on the bed, burying his lips across Stiles’. He utterly devoured him, ignoring the fact that his hips were pressed to the belly beneath him, smearing the lubricant he’d just carefully applied in a mess between them. “I missed you, too. I can’t,” he kissed him again. “...believe you took off…” he nipped at his bottom lip. “....like that without…” he danced his tongue with Stiles’. “....telling me what was going on.” Derek pulled up and growled, ducked back down and kissed him hard. “Brat.”

When they parted finally, Stiles was laughing, obviously the only reasonable response to Derek’s sudden attack. “It’s not funny, I know, and I’m sorry. Kiss me again, please.”

Derek obliged, feeling as though he could kiss Stiles for eternity and not have kissed him enough. He cupped Stiles’ face with the hand not covered in lube and their lips played back and forth for a moment. When he pulled back up, Stiles was still smiling and it was the most beautiful thing Derek had ever seen. 

“Now fuck me. Mark me as yours and I swear, I’m never leaving again.”

A low growl emanated from Derek’s chest again, human and wolf in complete agreement with Stiles’ request. A quick reapplication of lubricant, and Derek pressed himself between Stiles’ legs, opening him wide, and sliding inside of him. They held still for two breaths, staring at one another, and then Derek’s mouth went to Stiles’ neck and they moved together. Their hips rucked against one another, Stiles tight around Derek’s hardened cock. The noises that left the two of them were inhuman, unholy, and maddening. 

Derek grabbed one of Stiles’ legs and pushed it upwards. Stiles wrapped the other one around Derek’s hips, pulling him in harder. Derek’s free hand was pressed into the mattress, helping to hold him up and give him leverage with his thrusts. Stiles had a hand in Derek’s hair and another scratching down his back.

Their orgasms punched through them both at the same time, Derek spilling warmth inside of Stiles and Stiles making a mess between their stomachs. They stayed locked together as their breathing tumbled slowly down to normal levels once more. Derek eventually pulled out, soft and tired now, and settled with his hips a little lower so that his head rested on Stiles’ chest.

“You’re lying in our cum.” Stiles was brushing his hands through Derek’s hair now.

Derek managed somewhat of a shrug, fighting the urge to drift off. His eyes were heavy though. He wrapped his arms around and underneath Stiles, hugging his whole body to him as he listened to the quick pitter-patter of his heart. It was a much better sound than the slow thump-thump that had been sounding at the hospital. “It happens.”

Stiles chuckled, rocking their bodies slightly. “It sure does, big guy.” They settled together and glorified in the mess they made, talking in quiet whispers.

“How are you feeling?” Derek asked.

“Tired.”

“I know that. I meant-”

“Good, Derek. Really, I feel good. I think I’m still in a bit of shock, that’s all.”

Derek pressed a kiss to Stiles’ chest. “I had to give you the bite. I couldn’t let you… not without trying.”

“I’m glad you did.”

“You know, you could have asked instead of leaving.”

“Derek, I couldn’t. I know what happened… I know what you went through. My mother had this same sickness, I-” He took in a breath that had Derek pulling up to look at him. “It destroys the brain, it does a lot of damage Der. I didn’t have much confidence I could survive the bite, even early on. I watched my mom go through it and I didn’t want you to go through watching someone for a third time.”

Derek huffed out a breath of emotion but stayed quiet a minute. When Stiles didn’t say more, obviously waiting to hear a response, Derek spoke up. They’d been whispering, and Derek kept that still, but his voice sounded suddenly too loud in the empty room. “It was the wrong choice.”

He could feel Stiles nod, their bodies jostled slightly from the movement.

“I don’t mean to make you feel bad about it, I don’t. But you’re being open, and I guess I need to be as well. You…” He took in a thoughtful breath. “I’m done without you.”

Derek could feel Stiles take in another deep breath, then he was pushing them upwards. He didn’t say anything, just brushed Derek’s hair back again and urged him off the bed. Derek moved easily, letting himself be guided towards the bathroom. He kept a hand on Stiles, drifting down his shoulder, resting on his lower back, tangling with his fingers as they stepped under the spray of water together. He couldn’t stop touching and neither could Stiles. They washed each other between kisses, and reveled in a quiet awareness of who they are.

 

~*~*~*~

A few days after clinging to each other and not leaving the loft, Stiles woke up to an empty bed. He brushed his hand over the spot Derek normally occupied and it felt cool. With a stretch and a yawn, Stiles could feel a thrum running through his body that was starting to recognize as the wolf part of himself. Tonight was the full moon. His muscles twitched like he’d been running, but not painfully. His skin itched if he thought about it too much. Every noise was dulled to the sound of his own blood pumping through his veins.

Light seeped through the crack in the heavy curtains and Stiles walked with bare feet to where it poured across the carpet. He stood in the warmth and let it heat up his mostly naked body. The heat felt good to his twitching muscles.

When the smell of breakfast wafted through the door to the bedroom, Stiles’ stomach gave a grumble and he patted it. “You’re right, we need to go get our hands on whatever delicious thing that is.” He stretched again, scooped to grab a discarded t-shirt from the floor to add to his boxers, and walked out to the rest of the loft. 

Derek was tossing something in a pan and Stiles could hear the coffee pot gurgling off to the side. Padding over first to his mate, Stiles ducked his head and planted a kiss between his bare shoulder blades, trailing over the smooth triskelion. He let his hand trail across his lower back, feeling the happy rumble Derek gave. Stiles moved for the coffee pot as Derek flipped french toast in the pan.

“Did you put cinnamon in it?” Stiles asked pouring two cups out when the coffee put sputtered the last drops out. 

“The coffee?” Derek turned with confused eyebrows at him.

Stiles glared playfully and tossed a dishrag at him. “The French toast sour wolf. Don’t give me that look or I’ll put milk in your coffee.”

Derek pulled a face and stuck out his tongue in disgust. “Don’t do that. Yes, I put in cinnamon. And some vanilla.” He pointed the spatula at Stiles, giving it two stern shakes. “Pick up the towel, you little monster.”

“Here’s your coffee, puddin’,” Stiles teased, rubbing up against Derek’s now exposed chest and setting the coffee next to him. He purposefully stepped right over the towel, ignoring it.

“Don’t you puddin’ me. You threw it, you pick it up.” Derek may have been trying to sound assertive, but it came out a bit too happy for all that. Stiles could feel the easiness between them, settling into something like the beginning of their relationship when they’d just started to get comfortable with one another.

Stiles did pick it up and he whipped it out at Derek’s hip lightly. There wasn’t enough of a snap to it to hurt but Derek still grumbled at him like it had. “Hey Der, I’m taking my coffee to the couch, okay?” Stiles tossed the dishrag into the sink to be taken away later and scooped up his coffee.

“Yeah, I’ll be just a few more minutes.”

Stepping up behind Derek on his way out, Stiles planted another kiss on him, this time across the top of his shoulder. He strolled out to the living area, only separated by an expanse of empty floor and then the back of the couch, and he stopped in the middle of the room. The curtains were drawn shut and the only light was the one above the stove where Derek cooked. Stiles hadn’t noticed before, but his eyes took in everything as if a much bigger light sourced the room. He set the coffee down, gazed about for a moment taking in the fact that the details on things were seen easy enough in the low light and then moved for the curtains. He was careful to draw them slowly so his eyes could adjust without pain. He practically purred when the sunlight poured over him. 

When Stiles walked back towards the couch, intent drawn to sinking into the comfortable thing the pack had spent many a night on, his eyes were drawn to something else. Behind the couch were marks and as he focused closely to it, Stiles recognized them as claw marks, scratched into the floor. Stiles drew in a sharp breath, fearful that Derek heard it, and caught a scent. It burned in his nasal cavity and he instinctively knew it as _poison_. A form of wolfsbane he didn’t know the name of but that his wolf did not like.

_“I was done without you.”_

The voice shocked Stiles back into the world. He looked up to see Derek standing a few steps away with plates of French toast. He was looking at Stiles, not the floor. Stiles could feel his legs weaken but he stared back, taking in the meaning of what Derek had been trying to imply last night. 

“Like you had said, I lost two mates previously and losing a third… no, losing you specifically was too much. I loved them, Genim. I did. But there is something different with you. There is this feeling in my head that I can’t really explain but when I read your letter, when I woke up, I felt it and I felt you.” He shook his head, moved into the room and set the plates down. Stiles turned with him, leaning into him as Derek wrapped his arms around him. “For lack of a better thing to say, I am completely in love with you, I don’t just love you.” 

Stiles didn’t realize he was crying until Derek’s fingers brushed away the tears. He leaned into him, having to tilt his head since they were about the same height, and set his head beneath Derek’s chin. “It’s the same for me and it’s why I did what I did. I get that was wrong now, and I promise, it’s you and me until the end, Der. You and me.” He squeezed his arms around Derek as tightly as he could. 

Derek hugged him back and kissed the top of his head. When Stiles’ stomach let out a growl again, he felt Derek tense and try to pull them apart. “You need to eat. Come on, breakfast on the couch, and then we’re going for a walk. You haven’t been out of this apartment since you got here.” 

Knowing he was right, Stiles went to the couch with him and they dug in. He ate a lot more today than usual, getting up to grab a bowl of cereal after the French toast was gone. Derek only smiled at him and explained his appetite would be larger since he was a wolf, especially on the day of the full moon. Stiles still blushed when Derek cut up some fruit after they were all done and offered him a bite of apple. He watched Derek’s fingers dip to his mouth and he wrapped his lips around them, sucking away stray apple juice. 

Stiles watched as Derek smiled at him, popping a piece of apple in his own mouth. “Where are we walking to?” 

Derek shrugged in response and started picking up dishes with a thoughtful look on his face. “We can hit some of the old running trails. That’s where we’ll go tonight for your first full moon anyway.” 

With a nod, Stiles helped him clean up from breakfast then went off to get changed. His skin was starting to feel tight again, head a little cloudy as he moved around the loft. “How come I don’t feel as aggressive as Scott seemed?" 

Derek was pulling his shorts on and poked his head around the corner at the sound of Stiles’ voice. “Probably a few reasons. He was enamored with Allison but she wasn’t really his anchor yet, not like I can be for you. Also, True Alpha probably has more aggression than a Beta.” 

They spent the late morning outside walking the trails and talking, rebonding. They only turned back home because both Stiles and Derek got a call from various pack members wondering about dinner and a pack run for Stiles’ first night as a real wolf. 

~*~*~*~ 


	2. Running with Pack

Stiles was sitting on the couch in between Scott and Isaac, watching Kira and Lydia bickering over a pair of shoes they both showed up in. His cheeks were starting to hurt from smiling and his hands were never empty of food being shoved at him. Each wolf had taken their turn sidling up with something and nuzzling at his neck. It didn’t take long for him to thoroughly smell of pack again. He’d always enjoyed being close to pack members when he was a human, smelling of each one, but there was something new with the wolf prowling just beneath his skin. As each wolf rubbed at him, his skin prickled with this warmth and the smell settled deep in his senses and his memory. He was sure he could pick out each member from miles away with the right wind direction.

He was practically humming as the sun started to set. And then the discomfort sneaked inside of him. A tightness spread slowly from his fingers, up his arms, and across his chest. Heat blossomed from his head and radiated downwards. His bones ached.

“Stiles,” a voice sounded from next to him. He looked over and Scott’s eyes were glowing a concerned alpha-red, soft and warm. “Stiles, dude, you okay?”

Sucking in a shuddery breath, Stiles nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.” His muscles tensed and quivered. His arm jerked slightly and Stiles froze. A fear that had nothing to do with his wolf flooded his mind. There was a high pitched whine that sounded shrilly in his ears and when his throat started to ache, he realized it was coming from him.

The other wolves perked up, edged in closer to reach out to their distressed packmate but the confinement only made him feel more on edge. He pushed away from them and stumbled from the couch. Stiles was taking in quick panicked breaths as he came around the coffee table and his hands groped for something to hold on to. He was pitching forward, unable to help himself stay upright when out of nowhere arms wrapped around him and kept him from the floor.

Stiles found himself pressed to a large chest with hands trailing up and down his back. A hushed voice whispered in his ear but he couldn’t make out what was being said. Stiles shook, his hands wrapping into a shirt to help hold himself upright, and closed his eyes tightly. He tried to keep the voices at bay, to stop the whispering in his head. It couldn’t be coming back. He was wolf now.

“Genim, look at me. Open your eyes and look at me.” The voice, in an instant, became deep and clear. The words held a sway he could not deny, a command he felt to the center of his mind.

Stiles’ eyes snapped open and he looked up at Derek’s face. Red eyes peered back but slowly the shifting hazel that normally colored Derek’s eyes flooded back into them. His lips were now pressed firmly closed and his brows were tucked heavily over his eyes in a scowl. It was a comfort to Stiles to see such familiarity staring back at him and something started to settle inside.

“What happened?” Derek’s lips parted long enough to mutter the phrase then smoothed back into a frown.

“I thought… when my arm and your whispering…” Stiles swallowed, pressed closer so that he could nuzzle his nose to Derek’s neck. “I thought it was coming back, that I wasn’t better.”

Derek’s hands shifted to cradle Stiles’ face. “It’s just the shift, I’m sure of it. You’re healthy again. The sick-sweet smell is gone.” He tilted Stiles’ face and inhaled along his pulse. “It’s gone.”

Stiles was still shaking slightly but he felt he could stand on his own if Derek let him go, so that was an improvement. And now he was aware of the concern that tinged his tongue bitterly and it came from the pack gathered behind him. He could hear the distinct whine of Isaac, the low grumbles from Erica and Kira, and could hear the shifting feet of the twins. Without turning, he closed his eyes and let everything sink into him. He could now also feel the heat that radiated from Scott standing just a few feet behind him. The tense, stoic worry of Jackson prickled his skin while Lydia’s breathing beat like hummingbird wings in his ears. Boyd’s heart pounded at the back of Stiles’ skull just over the slightly faster tempo of Danny’s. His whole pack was on the edge of their toes, ready to make whatever bad was here go away.

Warmth replaced the cold fear that had sat at the base of Stiles spine and a mindless numb washed through his brain. Then everything calmed all at once and the pack eased back. Stiles turned in Derek’s arms to glance at them all, a blush painting his cheeks. “Sorry,” he murmured.

“You don’t have to apologize,” Jackson grunted and was the first to turn away. He was heading for the door.

Stiles frowned but all of the others seemed to be gathering themselves to leave as well. 

Lydia was pressing between the twins, ushering them after Jackson. “Stiles, you went through a lot, the full moon will be tough, and no one expects you to be instantly better.”

Scott lingered, wavering in towards Derek and Stiles. “It’ll be fine, bro. Remember you had to cuff me to the radiator.” He grinned at him with that crooked jawline of his and Stiles couldn’t help but smile back. “But you’ve got the pack and we’ll help you.”

Stiles could feel Derek nod at this and he looked back at him, pulling them apart to do so. “Are we going on the run already?”

Derek nodded and pulled the curtain aside to let the bright light of the full moon filter in. “If you’re ready, we are.”

~*~*~*~

Stiles followed the pack out to the trails he’d just run with Derek this morning. There was definitely a different feeling now than when he’d been alone with his mate- an excitement where there had been a calm. He could still feel each separate wolf’s being and the thin stretch of his own skin didn’t feel as tight as they walked along the wooded path. He wasn’t sure what he expected from a pack run, but as they walked along in human form, this wasn’t it. Stiles glanced over at Derek who was keeping pace with him in the middle of everyone, though he was probably itching to get to the front and lead them.

Derek looked back and a small smile twitched the corner of his lips upwards. “When we get to the clearing.”

Not needing more than that, Stiles nodded and leaned closer to Derek, managing to brush their shoulders together. He knew where the clearing was and they had a little bit before they go there. “How do you… transform?”

A sigh escaped Derek and Stiles smiled, knowing he was breaking whatever schedule Derek had thought up for them. Stiles couldn’t wait until they reached the clearing to start asking questions though. “You’ll feel it naturally. You’re unconsciously fighting the Shift right now.”

Stiles nodded slowly, reached a hand out to flex his fingers in front of his face. He could feel something running through him, something that he was tapping down on. As strong as the urge to just let go was, Stiles focused his attention on the uneven path they walked. His fingers danced into Derek’s hand, entangling their hands together.

Scott was the first one to bound into the clearing out in the middle of the old Hale property. He was already partially shifted, dropping to all fours and darting out to the middle of the field before turning. When Kira strolled in, he pounced at her and Stiles watched as the pack responded. They all ran in and dropped down, Shifting to their werewolf sides and wrestling around while they waited for their alpha to start the run. Scott, though a True Alpha, had submitted to Derek’s rule when Stiles had announced himself Derek’s mate. That didn’t mean he didn’t sometimes lord over the other wolves, especially if he was able to rile up Jackson. Stiles noted that now, even Jackson was playing with the pack and it made him smile.

Derek tugged at Stiles hand and he turned to look at him, smile still spread on his face. The tug was gentle, but Stiles played into it and he sort of pinwheeled all the way around, crashing into Derek’s shoulder. “So do we wolf out now? Just what… _feel_ the wolf inside and let it take over?”

The unamused look that furrowed Derek’s brow made Stiles laugh. “You’re ridiculous, but, sort of yes. Just try it and I’ll coach you through if you need help.”

“Right.” Stiles gave a sharp, decisive nod and stepped back a few feet. He glanced at the moon, high and full in the sky now, and a rush of contentment swelled his chest. Scientifically he knew there shouldn’t be much reason the moon would affect the wolves so, other than maybe it had to do with the gravitational pull between it and the Earth. You know, the increase and decrease it had in its cycles. And the Shift itself was more magic than science, wasn’t it? The quick breakdown and rebuilding of muscle and bone to change shape and strengthen the body. Maybe lycanthrophy could be considered a disease even though it had rather positive-

“Stiles, you’re thinking too much.”

Derek’s voice snapped him from his logical transgressions. Stiles shifted, mouth slightly agape as was his natural default. “Yeah, right. I got this dude, don’t worry.” He waved Derek off when he tried to step forward. 

Shaking his arms out and loosening up, Stiles turned his eyes to the grass at his feet and let the world fade away. He took three deep breaths and let the tension fade away. He took three more breaths and let his body go slack, the tingling in his skin easing. The grass started to blur, the color of it in the moonlight shifting from a dark green to an odd blue, then tinted red, and suddenly Stiles could see each detail of the green shafts of grass as though he was looking through a microscope. Everything felt lighter, moving felt easier, and any worry Stiles might have had about his sickness was replaced with an innate knowledge that his body was healing and almost completely done.

“Whoa….” Scott’s voice sounded from beside him, heavier with his canines elongated.

“That’s… can he do that? He’s only a Beta!” Lydia hissed slightly over the pronunciation of any s or c she came across, her mouth still getting used to the teeth, too. She hadn’t been a wolf as long as some of the others.

Stiles glanced between them, understanding what they spoke but having no desire to speak back. He flipped his attention to Derek and found himself staring at the Hale-Scowl. He flattened his ears and tucked his tail, inching closer to his Alpha, wanting to make the concern fade from his face. The idea that Stiles was a full Shifted wolf didn’t exactly cross his mind, as much as he just knew he was a wolf. It was supposed to be and therefore not odd to his mind at all, though he felt the confusion of his pack and his Alpha. He whined and twined himself around Derek’s legs, stopping to rough his head over Derek’s stomach. Stiles’ wolf head rested about to Derek’s bellybutton. He whined, wagged his tail between his legs, and licked his own muzzle as he waited.

Derek just shook his head, dropped down to a crouch, and pulled Stiles to himself in a hug. “You are always a surprise, Genim.”

Stiles wagged his whole butt-end happily when Derek ruffled his ears, then dragged a tongue up his mates face and darted away playfully. When he turned back around, dropping his front end down, butt still wagging, he found Derek’s sleek black wolf staring back at him now. Stiles pounced.

The black wolf fell under the golden brown and they rolled in the field fighting for the upper hand. Slowly the pack joined in and the sounds of happy wolves echoed through the glade. When Stiles darted from the middle of the pack, Derek followed after with a short howl. Then the run began. Stiles fell in next to Derek, his legs eating up the ground beneath him and his muscles stretching in ways that had his body singing in ecstasy. After a couple of miles, he felt like he could run for days, and the others were keeping up in their humanoid shift just fine. Well, Scott may have tripped over that log but he gave the ‘don’t say a word’ look and Stiles couldn’t have said anything in this form had he wanted to.

The pack flew past a creek, over a couple of sloping hills sparsed with trees, and down into a valley with a river that was low on water this time of year. They slowed to a trot, Stiles making his way into the water almost immediately. He splashed his paws in it and watched as little fish darted in the slightly deeper pools that sat on the edges of the bank. With a quirk of his head, Stiles stared down into one, paw poised above the surface of the water. Wagging his tail, he pawed at a fish that happened by and yipped at it as if it would play back. Hearing the movement of his pack, Stiles darted back out of the water and caught up with them as they sprawled in the moonlight on the grassy bank. 

Stiles sat on his haunches between Scott and Derek and watched the pack. They were all breathing a little heavier, slowly relaxing. Stiles was still itching to run and play, but the happy feelings from the pack kept him seated for now. He leaned over and set his head on Scott’s shoulder huffing a breath at him from his nose. Scott obliged his pushy side and rubbed his head, then paid particular attention to Stiles’ ears when he leaned into Scott’s hand just so.

“So…” Kira chimed in through the quiet. “Is it normal that Stiles can shift like that? I mean, what’s with that?” Her fox fire had dimmed now that she was sitting and not running a wolf-pack’s pace.

Stiles looked at Derek as the question was directed at their Alpha. Derek shook his head, still in wolf form and gave the impression with his shoulders that he was shrugging. They all seemed to understand- he didn’t have a clue.

“We can take him to Deaton and let him study him,” Jackson suggested.

Stiles growled at him, his hackles raising a bit.

Lydia sighed, pushing Jackson’s shoulder. “He worded it badly, but going to Deaton would be a good idea, Stiles. He might know a little more about it.”

He let his tail wag a bit, then moved off Scott and curled up to Derek. The black and golden fur blended together as they snuggled close and listened to theories that the pack started passing around. Of course, knowing nothing about Stiles’ condition didn’t stop them all from guessing.

When yawns started to be passed around the pack, they headed back. Stiles was happy to run again and often circled large loops around them when they all weren’t running as fast as he wanted to. He made sure to stop by Derek each pass and rub against him, or nip him playfully, or some other sort of physical contact before darting off for another circle. 

Stiles was pretty sure he could get very used to being a werewolf. He was definitely sure he could get used to living this new life with Derek.


End file.
